We are always hearing ‘just be yourself!’ We hear it in the media, movies and pretty much all the time growing up. It’s the go to way to comfort someone questioning their worth or finding it hard to accept themselves. It’s far easier said than done, that’s for sure! Developing self-love and acceptance is a marathon, not a sprint. In other words, it’s hard it is to overcome ingrained insecurities so it will take time.
We are all unique individuals. We have faults, talents and experiences that no one else has. Just as your life has been unique up until this point, the way you accept yourself will be unique too. It might take you a long time to accept yourself, it might take no time at all. There is no point in comparing yourself to others – your life will unfold in its own way.
Often, we feel we need to change what makes us different – we should be more like others. People will put pressure on you to change. But celebrate what makes you different – it’s what makes you, you. If people don’t accept you, you will find other people who do. Keep looking.
Remember to be kind and loving to yourself, even when it feels like it doesn’t matter. Excessive self-criticism can have lasting and damaging impacts on your self-worth.
Make sure you surround yourself with people who build you up, encourage you and support you. If people are constantly criticising you and breaking you down, it’s a whole lot harder to accept yourself.
Accept yourself in the good and the bad times. It’s all good and well to feel comfortable when things are going right, but accepting yourself is even more important when you’re feeling a little down or unhappy with life. .
One of the most important parts of accepting yourself is forgiving yourself. We need to be able to forgive and understand our own actions and flaws, to overcome them and begin to love ourselves. We also need to be able to forgive others and the world around us. We all understand the mistakes of others because we have made similar mistakes. See others and ourselves with kindness and understanding, though it isn’t always easy, is an amazing way to start accepting ourselves for who we are.
Remember, don't live to exist, exist to live.
Change your perspective and uncover a way forward for you!
Here are some things that can help you with that.
YouTube
Great
reads
Radical Self-Acceptance by Tara Brach
Radical Self-Acceptance gives you a way to discover the freedom that comes with kindness and true appreciation of yourself and others.
Just As You Are by Michelle Skeen and Kelly Skeen
A practical guide to silencing your nit-picky inner critic, cultivating self-compassion, and discovering who you want to be.
The Self-Love Experiment by Shannon Kaiser
Shannon Kaiser walks you through her own personal experiment, a simple plan that compassionately guides you through the process of removing fear-based thoughts, so you can fall in love with life.
Great
Films
Eigth Grade
Kayla Day, is in the eighth grade. She is introverted but also posts videos about self-confidence online. Soon, she realises she is not the person she is pretending to be and has to accept that.
Men, Women, Children
The excessive use of the internet affects a group of teenagers and their parents as they try dealing with their relationships and self-image issues.
Jeff, Who Lives at Home
Jeff is 30, unemployed and desperately looking for a sign that will lead him to his destiny. One day, a wrong number leads Jeff on a series of misadventures that help him find what he is looking for.
Spotify
The first step to being true to yourself is accepting yourself
What science says
Psychologist Carl Rogers identified something called ‘unconditional positive regard’ in 1959. It referred to how we think, talk and act about ourselves – and the startling impacts of these things on our concept of self-worth and psychological development. A person with a more positive outlook, who is able to overcome failure and views negative occurrences as ‘just a part of life’, is likely to be more successful.
Places to find more resources
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