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CONFIDENCE

having the confidence to do something new

Trying something new can be terrifying. It’s like your mind is being torn in two directions – one part says, “give it a try” and the other says “get the hell out of there”. Sometimes when we think of trying something new, our minds are flooded with thoughts that hold us back. We imagine every little thing that could possibly go wrong.

When it comes to doing something new, there is that critical moment when we are about to do it, but we just can’t take the leap. Here is something you can do to overcome that barrier.

First, name the fear. You’ll notice that when try something new, thoughts will pop into head sayings things “Don’t do this, it will be so embarrassing”. When this happens say to yourself “Oh my brain is trying to make me scared” Notice the fearful thoughts come up.

Next, blame your brain. When you notice the thoughts come up say to yourself “Okay my brain telling to be scared, but really I don’t need to be, everything is going to be okay”.

Once you have done that, focus your attention on what you are about to do, rather than the stressful thoughts flying flying your head. Feel the fear and do it anyway.

Doing these steps will train your brain not to feel so stressed the next time you try something new. It will take time to practice this – the stress isn’t going to disappear immediately.

Okay that’s some practical steps to feel less scared and act confidently, but I feel like I should mention this: true confidence is being comfortable with failures. Trying something new makes us scared because we are so worried that things will go wrong, that we will fail. And the truth is we will fail sometimes. You can only act with real confidence when you accept this fact and be comfortable with it. We act with confidence we can fail and keep trying.

Remember, you are more than your failures.

Change your perspective and uncover a way forward for you!

Here are some things that can help you with that.

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YouTube

Great
reads

Fire Keeper's Daughter by Angeline Bouley
Daunis Fontaine has never quite fit in, both in her hometown and on the nearby Ojibwe reservation. Daunis has big dreams but she has puts her future on hold to care for her fragile mother.

Just As You Are by Michelle Skeen and Kelly Skeen
A practical guide to silencing your nit-picky inner critic, cultivating self-compassion, and discovering who you want to be.

The Self-Love Experiment by Shannon Kaiser
Shannon Kaiser walks you through her own personal experiment, a simple plan that compassionately guides you through the process of removing fear-based thoughts, so you can fall in love with life.

Great
Films

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Eigth Grade
Kayla Day, is in the eighth grade. She is introverted but also posts videos about self-confidence online. Soon, she realises she is not the person she is pretending to be and has to accept that.

Men, Women, Children
The excessive use of the internet affects a group of teenagers and their parents as they try dealing with their relationships and self-image issues.

Jeff, Who Lives at Home
Jeff is 30, unemployed and desperately looking for a sign that will lead him to his destiny. One day, a wrong number leads Jeff on a series of misadventures that help him find what he is looking for.

Spotify

This playlist will make you feel like you can conquer the world.

Podcasts

The Verywell Mind Podcast with Amy Morin
This podcast is crammed full of practical discussions and advice on everything from confidence to self-doubt.

The Self Esteem and Confidence Mindset
In this episode Jonny discusses chasing confidence and self-esteem. Sound familiar?

Confidence & Self Esteem Podcast
This episode discusses getting slightly out of your comfort zone and challenging yourself and I'm no different when it comes

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