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CONFIDENCE

Standing up for myself

Standing up for yourself is hard. When others disrespect you it’s hard to have to confidence to speak and say how you feel. But hopefully these tips and resources will make it a bit easier.

You deserve to be heard. When people aren’t treating us right it is easy to keep quiet about it – we don’t want to ruin a friendship or a relationship, so we don’t say anything. The first thing you must realise is that your thoughts and feelings deserve to be heard. You deserve respect.

Don’t act just yet. You have been there – your angry or upset and say something you regret later. So, before you stand up for yourself look at the situation from the other person’s perspective. Maybe they are unaware of the fact that they are hurt you. Think about the emotions you are experiencing, even write them down. The point is to give yourself time so that when you do stand up for yourself, you do it in the best way possible – cool, calm and considerate.

Don’t be too nasty, but don’t be too nice. Don’t personally attack the other person. In other words, don’t be awful and mean – don’t say things like “You are literally the worst person to ever be born” (unless that’s true). At the same time, don’t too nice. Let them know their actions – intentional or not – are making you feel horrible. They should how you feel, and what they are doing to you is unacceptable.

Practice beforehand. Standing up to someone is scary. You might want to practice what you are going to say before you do it. Write your ideas down, practice front of the mirror, do whatever works for you. Feeling prepared will give you that much more confidence for when the big day comes.

Remember, you deserve to be heard.

Change your perspective and uncover a way forward for you!

Here are some things that can help you with that.

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YouTube

Great
reads

The Gift Of Imperfection by Brené Brown
The purpose of this workbook is to help readers embrace their imperfections and accept themselves for who they are, rather than trying hard to live a fake life in a bid to impress others.

The Self-Love Experiment by Shannon Kaiser
Put a stop to self-sabotage and overcome your fears so that you can gain the confidence you need to reach your goals and become your own best friend.

The Fine Art of Small Talk by Debra Fine
Debra Fine reveals the techniques and strategies anyone can use to make small talk--in any situation.

Great
Films

Napolean Dynamite
Napoleon, a socially awkward teenager, gets caught up in his dysfunctional family's misadventures while trying to help a friend win the class presidency.

Hidden Figures
Hidden Figures explores the story of a team of African-American mathematicians, working at NASA during the U.S space program and experiencing the sexism and racism of a male-dominated field.

The Kings Speech
King George VI tries to overcome his stammering problem with the help of speech therapist Lionel Logue and makes himself worthy enough to lead his country through World War II.

Spotify

This playlist will make you feel like you can conquer the world.

Podcasts

The Verywell Mind Podcast with Amy Morin
This podcast is crammed full of practical discussions and advice on everything from confidence to self-doubt.

The Self Esteem and Confidence Mindset
In this episode Jonny discusses chasing confidence and self-esteem. Sound familiar?

Confidence & Self Esteem Podcast
This episode discusses getting slightly out of your comfort zone and challenging yourself.

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