Jealousy can you make suspicious, angry or even ashamed. It’s never fun. Jealously springs up when you feel threaten by someone. They threaten you by seeming better in some way, shape or form.

If you feel jealous here are some things you can do:

When you feel jealous be aware of the contents of your thoughts and the feelings in your body. Take a step back, and look the sensations, images, feelings and thoughts that come up when you feel jealous. You might just find that these feelings and thoughts are actually connected to a traumatic experience you had in the past, and they are being triggered in the current situation. This will give you a bit of control over the feeling.

Talk it out. Find someone who you can talk about your feelings of jealously with. Could be a friend, could be a therapist. Just make sure this person can stay calm, listens carefully and doesn’t let you get too wrapped up in your thoughts. Remember, sometimes what we feel can be irrational or exaggerated. It is important to keep this in mind when talking about it. It will help you think about the situation more clearly, and you can then act more effectively.

There's no question that it takes a certain level of emotional maturity to deal with the many feelings around jealousy. It takes a willingness to challenge our critical inner voice and all the insecurities that come with it. It also takes willpower to step back and resist acting on our impulsive, jealous reactions. However, when we foster this power in ourselves, we realise we are a lot stronger than we think. By learning how to deal with jealousy, we become more secure in ourselves and in our relationships.