We have all been there, we wanted something to work out so badly, and in the end we were disappointed. We had great expectations, and we were greeted with mediocre results. Maybe you didn’t get the test results you wanted, or that person didn’t want to go on a second date. No matter what it is, we all have expectations for ourselves and our lives. It’s normal.
The problem is when our expectations are set so high that they become unrealistic. This leads to a lot of disappointment. So, to avoid being constantly disappointed by ourselves, others and our situation, we need to manage our expectations. Make sure they don’t get too out of hand.
Step one: be real. You need to be honest and realistic with yourself about what you can expect from the future. I am not saying “don’t be ambitious”. Work towards big goals, if you want, but be honest about how long it will realistically take to achieve those goals. It is easy to measure your life against successful people and feel disheartened. But remember, your life is not theirs – you have your own history and set of circumstances to deal with. Not everyone is going to graduate from Harvard at the age of 15. So be honest and gentle with yourself. Give yourself expectations that suit you, not other people.
Speaking of other people, the same goes for them. Set realistic expectations for others in your life, and they will be far less likely to disappoint you. Don’t let them walk all over you, but at the same time don’t hold them to standards you can’t achieve yourself.
Step two: be open to change. A lot of the time your expectations are not going to be met. Things change, and that’s okay. Next time your expectations are not met, pause and take a deep breath before you react. I know it’s frustrating to be disappointed but going with your gut reaction is not going to help in the long run. Instead, be aware of feeling frustrated, make a mental note of it, and give yourself time to cool off. This will give you a chance to respond to the unexpected change in a way that you’ll be proud of.
I think that’s it for now.
Goodluck.
Change your perspective and uncover a way forward for you!
Here are some things that can help you with that.
YouTube
Great
reads
Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus by Dusti Bowling
This book follows a spunky girl born without arms and a boy with Tourette syndrome navigating the challenges of middle school, disability, and friendship.
The Things We Cannot Say by Kelly Rimmer
Life changed beyond recognition for Alice when her son, Eddie, was born with autism spectrum disorder. She must do everything to support him, but at what cost to her family?
The 1000 Year Old Boy by Ross Welford
This book is about a boy destined to live forever, who only wants to grow up. Without death, life is just existence.
Great
Films
Wreck-It Ralph
Ralph is tired of playing the role of a bad guy and embarks on a journey to become a video game hero.
Surf's Up
Cody Maverick, a 17-year-old penguin, travels from Antarctica to Pen Gu Island hoping to win the Big Z Memorial Surf Off.
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Alexander wonders if bad things only happen to him, his mom, dad, brother and sister.
Spotify
To be honest, there are not many playlists about ‘managing expectations’, so instead, here is a playlist that will help make you feel great.
Podcasts
Managing Expectations
This podcast discusses different aspects of the two host's tribulations that come with expectations and what they mean to everyone.
Anything Goes
Thoughts, conversations, and advice on topics about her trials and tribulations of friendships.
Teenager Therapy
What are the different ways we people please?We talk about this and also taking criticism, confidence, and knowing yourself.
Places to find more resources
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